Stop Calling, Steve!

My funny story for this week ... we have home phones that will "announce" who is calling once the phone rings.  It's a lady computer type voice that can be hard to understand sometimes.  Anyway, the other morning I was super busy trying to arrange haircuts, get house chores done, and get Bran ready to take to senior pictures, etc.  And, of course, the phone kept ringing and ringing all morning.  Every time the caller ID said, "Call from ... Steve."  I never actually looked at the phone or number since I was busy and by the third call from "Steve," I was shouting back to the caller ID, saying things like, "STEVE, I don't know you!" ... "Steve, Quit calling me, I'm busy!" and "STEVE, GIVE IT UP!  STOP CALLING!!!"  Finally after about four or so calls from Steve, I stomped over to the phone as it rang again and I actually READ the caller ID ... which said "SKEET" NOT "Steve," as the lady computer voice kept saying!  (Guess she didn't have anything in her database for the word SKEET.)  Poor Skeet had been calling all those times from Pep Boys, needing a ride home while they worked on his car.  Oh dear.  I will definitely be taking calls from STEVE from now on!  Hahahaaa!  Sorry, Skeet!  :)

Pokémon Go

Dylan wanted to play Pokemon Go during the sermon in church this morning. Of course I looked "shocked" and said, "NO!" To which Dylan replied, "I wanted to see if Pokemon could find Jesus in here ..." Nice try, Dyl.

Brandon 101

Life with Brandon Taylor 101:  if your mom piles all the clothes, socks, hats, food wrappers, and Gatorade bottles from your floor to your bed, don't do something ridiculous like put it all away. Just sleep on a tiny open space on the floor instead. 🙄 #collegestudentlogic.

REALLY Old

Bran was telling me tonight about some car show he had been watching on TV and he said, "Cool, Mom, they totally remodeled this REALLY SUPER, SUPER OLD, OLD CAR so it looks good now ... it was some car made in the 1970s!"  Um .. thanks, Bran.

Dry cleaning

Embarrassing moment of the day:  I took some clothes from our trip to the dry cleaners and obviously had not done a good job of sorting out the clothes in my suitcase when we got back.  Point in case:  after I dropped off the clothes to be cleaned, the nice, Indian dry cleaner man chased me down in the parking lot to return a pair of my underwear and a bra I had mixed in with the dry cleaning.  Nice.

Men's Room

Recieving the "mother of the year" award again today (hope you note the sarcasm there)!!!  Went to a different Walmart than our usual one and proceeded to march Lily Claire straight into the MEN'S RESTROOM!  It was on the left where the WOMEN'S restroom is at OUR Walmart and did I read the sign? Of course not!!!  Lily Claire stopped in her tracks and stared at the urinal and asked, "What do we do?"  "RUN!!!!!"  I said.  Thank the LORD there was no one in there or we both would have been scarred for life, I'm sure!!!

Moms

Lily Claire asked me if God could hear us.  I said, 'Yes, God always hears us and watches after us and takes care of us and loves us!"  Lily replied, "No He doesn't ... that's what MOMS do!"

Hooters

Ummmm... WHO in my house DVR'd the Hooters International Beauty Pageant?!!!!  ....  Brandon?!!

Hell

I've died and woken up in hell.

Oh no, wait ... I'm just trying to get my boys to do their summer reading with the dreaded assignments.  Same thing, really.

Men vs. Women

Ahhh, yes ... ever since the dawn of time, men have a hard time communicating with women.  Today, a little boy at the pool kept wanting to get Lily's attention and play with her in the water.  His tactic?  Hitting her with a beach ball in the head and getting right in her face and shouting over and over "LET'S PLAY DEAD BABY SHARK!"  Needless to say, Lily went kicking away angrily in the OPPOSITE direction with her Mermaid Barbie and My Little Ponies screaming, "NO!  I do NOT want to play dead baby shark!!!!"  Sorry fella.  Better luck next time!

Twins

Just told Dylan that the panda at the zoo had twins!  "Aren't ALL pandas pretty much twins?"  he asked.  Good point.

Terminology

Last night as we were reminiscing about the day, Dylan says to Lily and me, "Wow ... Sky Zone was so awesome!!! .... Except that one time in dodge ball when some kid pegged me in the jingle bells." Ummm ... Thank you, Robert Skeet Taylor, for teaching the boys such accurate scientific terminology.  And thank you, Dylan, for sharing this fascinating tidbit with your mom and sister. 🙄

Cat Jail

Several years ago on our mountain Trip, Lily tried to pet a cat that was wandering around and it scratched her. So she got her revenge by drawing a picture of the perpetrator in "cat jail." 😂😂

My Son

Yep. Bran's my son. He likes to drive barefoot, windows down, country music playing.

Bible Humor

A few weeks ago in "Mom's VBS," we learned about Joseph.  Lily and I happened to get this drink at the store last week and we said instead of Joseph's Coat, we got Joseph's Coke!  Hahaaaa!  A little Bible humor there for ya!

Sleepovers

You know your OCD fixation with vacuuming is out of control when your daughter is lying in bed at night going to sleep and says,"I don't like sleepovers at night because I miss the sound of your voice and the Roomba running." 😂😂

High Heels

Lily Claire is a definitely her mother's daughter (as if we didn't already know that!).  She was clomping around the house in these pink, plastic Cinderella high heel shoes and said,"Mom, these shoes really hurt!"  "Take them off," I said.  She looked shocked and said, "No!  They are cute high heels!"  Guess we all must suffer for beauty! :)

Citizen's Arrest

We bought a special promo cup for Brandon at RaceTrac that you can refill through August 1st for free every time you are there.  Today he drove past there and went in to fill his cup and leave.  Some older man (another customer) chased him out of the store screaming, "Hey!  Hey!  You didn't pay for that drink!!!  Come back and pay!!!"  Bran turned around and said, "It's a promo cup you can refill for free."  The guy said, "Oh." and went back in the store.  Guess it was a Mango Slushie Citizen's Arrest of some sort!  Sheesh! :)

Rushing Toward Success

Got tickled today at Walmart observing a teenage worker who was moving so slowly that I was concerned if she even had a pulse!  When we encountered her again in the store, I noticed her t-shirt said "Rushing Toward Success." It's going to be a long, long journey at that pace!!! Hahahaaaa!!!

Art School

I was dusting the boys' room today and couldn't help but notice their clay projects from elementary school art class. Then it struck me .... WHY am I spending so much time worrying about good grades and hoping for sports scholarships when OBVIOUSLY a full ride awaits them in ART SCHOOL?! Donatello and Michelangelo really can't hold a candle to these quality sculptures. 😂😂

Bible Stories

Oh dear.  I am afraid Lily Claire is not quite grasping clearly the Bible stories I'm trying to teach her this summer!  She thinks Adam and Eve are "Abba and Denise" and now she just asked if she and her friend could watch "Jesus Gets Eaten By A Whale."  Nice. (2013)

Gander Mountain

Skeet made Lily and me go into Gander Mountain tonight while he bought bullets after going to the shooting range with Bran today. As you can image, we were thrilled.  Luckily, we spotted some fabulous merchandise while we were waiting!! Love me some yarn-y camo tree fluff suits!!!  Dreams do come true!

I Spy

A glimpse of what it is like to play "I Spy" with Lily Claire ...
LC:  I spy with my little eyes something rainbow!
Me:  Rainbow?  Ok ... (I guess about 20 things that could possibly be "rainbow" and none of them are it)  Lily, give me a hint!
LC:  Mom, it's rainbow WITH red, white, and blue and stars!
Me:  Is it that flag flying outside?
LC: YES!!!
Silly me!  I didn't know to look for the "rainbow, red, white, and blue with stars" item first thing!!!

Checking Account

The man at the bank that helped me over the phone had to pick out the design on my new checks when I had to shut down my old checking account suddenly a few weeks ago.  I told him that my current check design was flowers.  He said he had something perfect along those lines that I would like.  Today I opened the package of 200 new checks that arrived in the mail ... that are all WINNIE THE POOH!?!  Oh well.