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Monday, April 30, 2018

Livin the Dream

(2014) Yep .... Middle school is on the horizon!  Dyl asked tonight if he could invite some GIRLS to his birthday party at the skating rink.  Those ole yucky girls aren't seeming so bad anymore! 😉. The more things change, the more they stay the same ... girls, pizza, and and skating rinks STILL add up to livin' the dream for an eleven year old boy!

Bandaid

(2013) Lily Claire had her five year old check up today to get ready for Kindergarten registration on Thursday. When discussing her finger prick tonight, she said to me, "I needed a band-aid for my finger today because the doctor shot it."

Trash

Most HORRIBLE event of my day.... I noticed that the outside recycle bin was full of rain water so I gingerly picked it up and dumped out the water right near my foot. Out slid a stiff drowned mouse ... I FREAKED and am still completely creeped out!  I think I may have to take a sick day tomorrow for severe mental distress and trauma!! This definitely ranks up there with the time the squirrel jumped out at me from the outdoor trashcan onto my shoulder ... I am no longer having anything to do with the trash around here!!

Saturday, April 28, 2018

Uno

I am cracking up at this post on my wall "Jennifer likes Uno and The Bible."  I hope God knows it's not necessarily in that order! :)

Made in China

(2016) Life with Dylan 101.
He was assigned a project in his Social Studies class to learn about China. His task was to bring in a Chinese artifact of some sort and explain about it to the class.
Me: "How did your Social Studies sharing go today? What did you take in for your Chinese artifact?"
Dylan: (whipping out a John Cena wrestling action figure). "This."
Me: (dumbfounded) What? Why?!!  John Cena has NOTHING to do with China!!
Dylan (emphatically): "Yes he does, Mom!  It says right here on his foot, 'Made In China'!"

Great. Can't wait to see the stellar grade we get on that one.

Friday, April 27, 2018

Hooligan

(2013) Had a nice ride with Brandon at the wheel this evening after supper!  He took me up to Kroger to buy some flowers for the kitchen, then we stopped by Grammie and Papaw's house to say hello!  He did a great job!  Tomorrow he's going to drive us to church.  Best quote of the night from Bran:  When a car in front of us didn't use a turn signal, Bran shook his head and said, "Geez.  What a hooligan."  Cracked me up!

Thursday, April 26, 2018

Integrity

My third graders are apparently getting a bit mixed up with our fancy terminology from the year! We talk a LOT about the word INTEGRITY, and in the hall before lunch today, I was giving a little reminder...
Me:  Ok guys, remember to make good choices in the cafeteria today even when the monitor is not looking at you.
Kids: (nodding, agreeing enthusiastically) We will, Mrs. Taylor!
Me: What do we call it when we do the right thing even when no one is watching?
Of course, I’m expecting the answer “integrity,” which we say all the time. So, I call on a little guy frantically waving his hand, looking really confident.
Me: Yes, Nate?
Nate: I know, Mrs. Taylor!! It’s having PROTAGONIST!!
We all stare in silence for a moment looking confused. 😂
Me: Ummm, not quite, dude, it’s INTEGRITY, but pretty impressive!
Nate and I both cracked up! Guess all our big words from the year have gotten a little jumbled up in our third grade brains with summer so close! Integrity... protagonist... yeah, close enough. 😂😂

Tuesday, April 24, 2018

Rolly Poleys

(2013) Today's life lesson for a nine year old boy (aka, Dylan) .... Don't leave your tennis shoes outside overnight in the spring unless you want to freak out when you find them on the way to school in the morning and they are covered with a zillion rolly poleys!!!!  Cracked me up!!

Walgreens

We had a "Men Are From Mars" moment tonight as Skeet and I were getting ready for a formal "gala" event we were attending.  I have a very pretty  black clutch purse with little rhinestones on it that I was going to use this evening to carry my phone and some lipstick,etc.  Well I realized once we were here that I had left it at home.  Trying to help me solve the problem, Skeet suggested, "We could stop at Walgreens on the way and get one."  Hmmmm ... I don't recall a section in Walgreens that carries satin rhinestone evening bags, but thanks for trying, honey!!!  Cracked me up!  I'm pretty sure Walgreens DOES carry everything ever needed in "man" world so it seemed like a logical idea for him, I'm sure!

Lyrics

(2014) Lily and I were riding home from the baseball game and Zac Brown's new song "Homegrown" came on the radio (which is great song, by the way!).  One of the lines in the song said, "Got a good looking woman with her arms 'round me."  Lily asked me why the song just said, "Got a good looking mama that tastes like meat."  I cracked up!

Elliptical

What a sad state of affairs! I JUST found the power cord for an elliptical we bought a YEAR ago (yes, already a sad story), but tonight I was FINALLY going to get on it and do at least 20 minutes. I envisioned myself leisurely strolling along on it for 20 minutes every evening after school watching some romantic BBC movie on the fancy tablet holder.  Ummmm ... I have now done FIVE minutes and my muscles are throbbing, and I’m lying dead across the floor sweating under the ceiling fan!!! I had to stop and rest after TWO! Not only that, but I was panting too hard to even HEAR the Jane Austen show on the darn tablet! Wow. Guess my NEW REVISED goal for tomorrow is SIX minutes on the elliptical and maybe a couple of brief GLANCES at Mr. Darcy before collapsing! #48creptuponme #persevere

Monday, April 23, 2018

Skeleton

(2011) Life with Dylan:  This morning we were talking about Easter and I said, "Jesus died for us then rose from the grave three days later!"  Dylan:  "Cool!  So Jesus is a skeleton now?"  Sigh.  "No Dyl, Jesus is not a skeleton!"

Friday, April 20, 2018

Sandwiches

(2013) Just dropped Lily Claire off at Grammie's house for a "playdate."  They are playing dollhouse together and doing puzzles!  On the way there, Lilly told me that Grammie makes the best sandwiches in the world!  I asked her what kind of sandwiches they were and Lily said, "The heart shaped kind."

Thursday, April 19, 2018

Mess

(2011) Whenever Lily Claire has been outside playing and she looks a mess, I tell her she looks like a little "rag-a-muffin."  Today she had a checkup at the doctor and I told her we needed to brush her hair, to which she replied, "Why?  Am I a "mag -a -ruffin?"  :)

Terrified

(2011) TERRIFIED ... I've been leaving the deck door open on nice evenings so Lily can play in the backyard and this evening I saw a MOUSE in our house.  I am FREAKED OUT!  I just went and bought a million traps from Ace Hardware! I think I might never come in my house again!!!!!

Useless

(2016) Helping Bran with a paper for his British Lit class tonight that is about how the Victorian ideals of the time were portrayed in Dickens' Oliver Twist and how he used the novel to attack the Poor Laws of the time, etc.  I am all enthused and loving every second of it and remembering how much I LOVE everything about this time period and topic. Meanwhile, Bran is miserable writing this paper and says to me,"Seriously ...  This is completely useless and and no normal person cares about a bunch of poems that make no sense and all these long, confusing stories ....What kind of weird person would go to college and get a whole degree in this stuff!!?"  Long awkward pause.  "Um.  That would be me, son."  Nice backpedalling, Bran. Yes, he is definitely his father's son.  ðŸ˜„ Hahaaaa!!!

Tuesday, April 17, 2018

Poison Ivy

Have you heard about the homemade remedy for poison ivy? ....
you make it from scratch!
I've just been itching to try it!
Hahahahahaaa!  Ok, sorry ... I've obviously been hanging around with nine and ten year olds too long!
Seriously, SOOOO glad the doctor sent out some medicine for me today to get rid of the poison ivy I got working in the yard this past weekend!  It's been driving me crazy and just won't go away!  It just keeps popping up everywhere ... on my face and legs and arms ... arg! I won't be sad to see it go, that's for sure!

Monday, April 16, 2018

13

(2011) By the way, Brandon had a GREAT 13th birthday, though I think he fully expected to wake up on that day with a full mustache and a drivers license. :)  Sorry buddy ... Give it a few more years!

Best Friend

(2010) Lily Claire's teacher told me today that her little two year old classmates were on the floor at circle time and each child in the class was telling about his/her "best friend."  The other kids were naming children in the class as their best friends, but when they got to Lily Claire and asked her who was her best friend, she said "Mama" ... you KNOW I loved that!!!!!!

Sunday, April 15, 2018

Skunk

(2013) Dylan came home all dirty and sweaty from his batting practice then played outside until dark.  When he came in, Lily took one step toward him and said sternly, "Dylan, you better go get a bath or your friends will think you're a skunk."  No one loves you like your sibilings!!!  Hahahaha!!

Saturday, April 14, 2018

Grass

(2014) Bran was recounting to me a recent dinner he had at an Italian restaurant.  He said the waitress came and asked him if he wanted a Caesar salad or mixed greens.  He said he knew he didn't like Caesar so he order the mixed greens, not really knowing what it was.  He said in shock, "Mom, when they brought the salad, the leaves were ALL PURPLE!!!!  And then I asked for ranch dressing and they said the dressing was already on it and I couldn't see ANYTHING.  I felt like I was eating grass, like some cow, but I didn't want to say anything and seem rude."  CRACKED me up!!!

Thursday, April 12, 2018

Manners

One of the hallmarks of being a Southern mother .... reminding your kids of every rule of good manners ever known to man while taking them to any event away from home  ... a birthday party, a sleepover, whatever.  The poor kid is trapped in the back seat of the car all the way to their friend's house while you repeat the same age-old list ... "Don't ask for a bunch of food, wait until it's offered ... don't grunt when an adult speaks to you, say Yes M'am and No M'am ... be SURE and say thank you and please ... don't run in their house and wipe your feet on the mat when you go in ... don't act like a buffoon or you'll never be invited again ..."  The kid just nods automatically at every rule you throw out there, like one of Pavlov's dogs hearing a bell for the millionth time.  By the time you pull into the driveway, they can't get out of the car fast enough and the only thing they are thinking is that they sure wish DAD had given them a ride instead of Mom!!!  :)

Wednesday, April 11, 2018

Apps

(2013) I am cracking up ... Grammie is asking Dylan which apps/games he doesn't need on her Ipad anymore.  After looking over a bunch of racing games and baseball games, etc, he said, "We could delete this one called dictionary."  Guess that one doesn't rank high on the cool apps list for nine year old boys!!!

Wrong Room

 Deb and I were coming back up from the pool at our hotel one evening and realized we didn't have a key to our room.  The kids were in the room so we knocked and when no one answered, we started banging on the door over and over and over and shouting, "OPEN THE DOOR" and "COME ON" and yelling all the kids names real loud and annoyed through the door.  Finally we heard someone inside the room talking in a voice we totally didn't recognize and we noticed that instead of being at room 904 (our room) we were at room 704!!!!!  We had been talking and laughing on the elevator and we had gotten off at the WRONG floor by accident!!!  So we did what any grown 40+ year old women would do when we heard someone coming to the door after all our banging and screaming .... WE RAN!!! (with our two huge bags of beach buckets and toys and snacks AND beach mats and towels and sunscreen cans clanging all the way down the hall!)

Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Wrong Customer

I am cracking up that beside my $10.01 balance in my savings account, Wells Fargo posted a big red-flag notice that says IT’S TIME TO INVEST! In what??? Some items from the Dollar Store?! 😂😂😂 #wrongcustomer

Scouting

(2015) Oh lord. Dylan just came over to me at the pool and I said, "What are you doing?"
He answers, "I'm scouting."
"Scouting what?" I ask.
"Girls," he answers with a huge grin.
Here we go again with son #2!

Sanctuary

My backyard is quickly becoming a sanctuary for me. It’s so peaceful and quiet, and I’m so happy there. Today I sat in the covered swing surrounded by daffodils and purple azaleas while the cherry blossoms floated in the breeze like pink snow. Birds chirped and darted back and forth from the feeders, while Buddy contently lay nearby in a little patch of sunshine chewing his bright orange ball. For that short while, it was truly a little piece of heaven on earth.

Sunday, April 8, 2018

Bubbles

(2012) Dylan is shedding his "cool guy-ness" for a little while this morning to play whatever Lily wants to play in the pool. At the moment he is having to be a baby sea turtle named Bubbles.

Saturday, April 7, 2018

Marshmallows

(2011) Skeet bought Dylan a big bag of mini-marshmallows and now he's the new George Washington Carver of marshmallows!  So far he's had peanut butter, jelly, and marshmallow sandwiches, marshmallow cinammon toast, marshmallow and Cocoa Puffs cereal, marshmallow milk ... you name it and Dylan has put marshamallows on it!

Translation

(2015) Lily said to me today, "I am sooo glad this combo had a frequency!!!"  Translation: "I am so glad this condo had a vacancy!!!"

Friday, April 6, 2018

The South

You know you're in the south when you pass a restaurant called Big D's BBQ Trough situated amongst a trailer park, a baptist church, and Sharky's Firework and Moccasin Emporium.  Now to find that roadside stand of boiled peanuts....

Wednesday, April 4, 2018

Hero

I single handedly saved the family from a big, gross jellyfish that washed up beside us on the beach today! No one else would get rid of it, so I bravely scooped it up with our purple shovel and threw it out to sea. I am a hero. 😂

Monday, April 2, 2018

Pan

Lily just saw this picture of the day she was born and asked, "Why was I in a pan?"  Hahahaa!

Pedicure

My husband's MALE comment of the day ... "Why are you going to get a pedicure?  Your toes still look pink."  (Yes, the old chipped pink polish from a month ago WAS still there, honey.)