True and funny stories from the lighter side of raising my sons and daughter. As the Southern mama of this crew, I'm usually somewhere between "Bless your hearts!" and "Y'all act like you got some sense!" If we ever need to find our way home, we just follow the trail of red clay and glitter.
Followers
Saturday, April 28, 2018
Uno
I am cracking up at this post on my wall "Jennifer likes Uno and The Bible." I hope God knows it's not necessarily in that order! :)
Made in China
(2016) Life with Dylan 101.
He was assigned a project in his Social Studies class to learn about China. His task was to bring in a Chinese artifact of some sort and explain about it to the class.
Me: "How did your Social Studies sharing go today? What did you take in for your Chinese artifact?"
Dylan: (whipping out a John Cena wrestling action figure). "This."
Me: (dumbfounded) What? Why?!! John Cena has NOTHING to do with China!!
Dylan (emphatically): "Yes he does, Mom! It says right here on his foot, 'Made In China'!"
Great. Can't wait to see the stellar grade we get on that one.
He was assigned a project in his Social Studies class to learn about China. His task was to bring in a Chinese artifact of some sort and explain about it to the class.
Me: "How did your Social Studies sharing go today? What did you take in for your Chinese artifact?"
Dylan: (whipping out a John Cena wrestling action figure). "This."
Me: (dumbfounded) What? Why?!! John Cena has NOTHING to do with China!!
Dylan (emphatically): "Yes he does, Mom! It says right here on his foot, 'Made In China'!"
Great. Can't wait to see the stellar grade we get on that one.
Friday, April 27, 2018
Hooligan
(2013) Had a nice ride with Brandon at the wheel this evening after supper! He took me up to Kroger to buy some flowers for the kitchen, then we stopped by Grammie and Papaw's house to say hello! He did a great job! Tomorrow he's going to drive us to church. Best quote of the night from Bran: When a car in front of us didn't use a turn signal, Bran shook his head and said, "Geez. What a hooligan." Cracked me up!
Thursday, April 26, 2018
Integrity
My third graders are apparently getting a bit mixed up with our fancy terminology from the year! We talk a LOT about the word INTEGRITY, and in the hall before lunch today, I was giving a little reminder...
Me: Ok guys, remember to make good choices in the cafeteria today even when the monitor is not looking at you.
Kids: (nodding, agreeing enthusiastically) We will, Mrs. Taylor!
Me: What do we call it when we do the right thing even when no one is watching?
Of course, I’m expecting the answer “integrity,” which we say all the time. So, I call on a little guy frantically waving his hand, looking really confident.
Me: Yes, Nate?
Nate: I know, Mrs. Taylor!! It’s having PROTAGONIST!!
We all stare in silence for a moment looking confused. 😂
Me: Ummm, not quite, dude, it’s INTEGRITY, but pretty impressive!
Nate and I both cracked up! Guess all our big words from the year have gotten a little jumbled up in our third grade brains with summer so close! Integrity... protagonist... yeah, close enough. 😂😂
Me: Ok guys, remember to make good choices in the cafeteria today even when the monitor is not looking at you.
Kids: (nodding, agreeing enthusiastically) We will, Mrs. Taylor!
Me: What do we call it when we do the right thing even when no one is watching?
Of course, I’m expecting the answer “integrity,” which we say all the time. So, I call on a little guy frantically waving his hand, looking really confident.
Me: Yes, Nate?
Nate: I know, Mrs. Taylor!! It’s having PROTAGONIST!!
We all stare in silence for a moment looking confused. 😂
Me: Ummm, not quite, dude, it’s INTEGRITY, but pretty impressive!
Nate and I both cracked up! Guess all our big words from the year have gotten a little jumbled up in our third grade brains with summer so close! Integrity... protagonist... yeah, close enough. 😂😂
Tuesday, April 24, 2018
Rolly Poleys
(2013) Today's life lesson for a nine year old boy (aka, Dylan) .... Don't leave your tennis shoes outside overnight in the spring unless you want to freak out when you find them on the way to school in the morning and they are covered with a zillion rolly poleys!!!! Cracked me up!!
Walgreens
We had a "Men Are From Mars" moment tonight as Skeet and I were getting ready for a formal "gala" event we were attending. I have a very pretty black clutch purse with little rhinestones on it that I was going to use this evening to carry my phone and some lipstick,etc. Well I realized once we were here that I had left it at home. Trying to help me solve the problem, Skeet suggested, "We could stop at Walgreens on the way and get one." Hmmmm ... I don't recall a section in Walgreens that carries satin rhinestone evening bags, but thanks for trying, honey!!! Cracked me up! I'm pretty sure Walgreens DOES carry everything ever needed in "man" world so it seemed like a logical idea for him, I'm sure!
Lyrics
(2014) Lily and I were riding home from the baseball game and Zac Brown's new song "Homegrown" came on the radio (which is great song, by the way!). One of the lines in the song said, "Got a good looking woman with her arms 'round me." Lily asked me why the song just said, "Got a good looking mama that tastes like meat." I cracked up!
Elliptical
What a sad state of affairs! I JUST found the power cord for an elliptical we bought a YEAR ago (yes, already a sad story), but tonight I was FINALLY going to get on it and do at least 20 minutes. I envisioned myself leisurely strolling along on it for 20 minutes every evening after school watching some romantic BBC movie on the fancy tablet holder. Ummmm ... I have now done FIVE minutes and my muscles are throbbing, and I’m lying dead across the floor sweating under the ceiling fan!!! I had to stop and rest after TWO! Not only that, but I was panting too hard to even HEAR the Jane Austen show on the darn tablet! Wow. Guess my NEW REVISED goal for tomorrow is SIX minutes on the elliptical and maybe a couple of brief GLANCES at Mr. Darcy before collapsing! #48creptuponme #persevere
Monday, April 23, 2018
Skeleton
(2011) Life with Dylan: This morning we were talking about Easter and I said, "Jesus died for us then rose from the grave three days later!" Dylan: "Cool! So Jesus is a skeleton now?" Sigh. "No Dyl, Jesus is not a skeleton!"
Friday, April 20, 2018
Sandwiches
(2013) Just dropped Lily Claire off at Grammie's house for a "playdate." They are playing dollhouse together and doing puzzles! On the way there, Lilly told me that Grammie makes the best sandwiches in the world! I asked her what kind of sandwiches they were and Lily said, "The heart shaped kind."
Thursday, April 19, 2018
Mess
(2011) Whenever Lily Claire has been outside playing and she looks a mess, I tell her she looks like a little "rag-a-muffin." Today she had a checkup at the doctor and I told her we needed to brush her hair, to which she replied, "Why? Am I a "mag -a -ruffin?" :)
Terrified
(2011) TERRIFIED ... I've been leaving the deck door open on nice evenings so Lily can play in the backyard and this evening I saw a MOUSE in our house. I am FREAKED OUT! I just went and bought a million traps from Ace Hardware! I think I might never come in my house again!!!!!
Useless
(2016) Helping Bran with a paper for his British Lit class tonight that is about how the Victorian ideals of the time were portrayed in Dickens' Oliver Twist and how he used the novel to attack the Poor Laws of the time, etc. I am all enthused and loving every second of it and remembering how much I LOVE everything about this time period and topic. Meanwhile, Bran is miserable writing this paper and says to me,"Seriously ... This is completely useless and and no normal person cares about a bunch of poems that make no sense and all these long, confusing stories ....What kind of weird person would go to college and get a whole degree in this stuff!!?" Long awkward pause. "Um. That would be me, son." Nice backpedalling, Bran. Yes, he is definitely his father's son. 😄 Hahaaaa!!!
Tuesday, April 17, 2018
Poison Ivy
Have you heard about the homemade remedy for poison ivy? ....
you make it from scratch!
I've just been itching to try it!
Hahahahahaaa! Ok, sorry ... I've obviously been hanging around with nine and ten year olds too long!
Seriously, SOOOO glad the doctor sent out some medicine for me today to get rid of the poison ivy I got working in the yard this past weekend! It's been driving me crazy and just won't go away! It just keeps popping up everywhere ... on my face and legs and arms ... arg! I won't be sad to see it go, that's for sure!
you make it from scratch!
I've just been itching to try it!
Hahahahahaaa! Ok, sorry ... I've obviously been hanging around with nine and ten year olds too long!
Seriously, SOOOO glad the doctor sent out some medicine for me today to get rid of the poison ivy I got working in the yard this past weekend! It's been driving me crazy and just won't go away! It just keeps popping up everywhere ... on my face and legs and arms ... arg! I won't be sad to see it go, that's for sure!
Monday, April 16, 2018
13
(2011) By the way, Brandon had a GREAT 13th birthday, though I think he fully expected to wake up on that day with a full mustache and a drivers license. :) Sorry buddy ... Give it a few more years!
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