Glitter Glue

(2013) Lily is laughing so hard she can hardly stand it .... she needed me to open a glitter glue pen for her and I couldn't get it open, so I squeezed it, thinking it might have a hole in the top where the glue came out.  Of course it did NOT, and the lid popped off real loud and flew off, and the glitter glue splatter all over my face and hands!  We both just sat there stunned for a minute, then Lily Claire died laughing!  Yep ... she's my child!

Waffle House

So I’m going to make a confession. Waffle House grosses me out, and I hate to go there.  My husband knows this, so he was in shock today when I texted him that I took the kids to Waffle House for breakfast because the boys LOVE it! One of those sacrificial mom moments, I guess. 😂 Anyway everything went fine, it was SORT OF clean, we ate our food (though they only have cold syrup and serve hashbrowns with everything, even a hamburger) and I was starting to think, “Ok, this wasn’t so bad...”.  Just as I was entertaining this positive thought, the waiter next to me dumped an entire gigantic bucket of bleach water on the floor right next to where I was eating. Classy. Couldn’t quite swallow down anymore waffle with the bleach fumes floating over the greasy floor by my feet.  Check, please.  😂😂

Bears

(2011) Great.  Dylan talked me into watching a show with him on Animal Planet called "Viking Wilderness."  One whole part was this long footage of these big bears mating and Dylan said, "Awwwwwww!  Mom, look!  That bear is hugging the baby bear!!!"  Of course I quickly agreed it was "super cute" and then tried to change the subject!!!!

Texts

I signed Bran up a few years back for text messages from a Youth Group at one of our local churches.  They text Bible verses, etc.  Anyway, his phone went off right in the middle of class today and the teacher looked mad.  Bran said, "Sorry, church is texting me" and the teacher said, "Oh ... ok then, go ahead and answer."  That cracked me up!!!!  Guess when God texts, by george, you ANSWER!

Crazy

You know you've been raised by a Southern mama when .... your husband rehires the cleaning service to help you around the house and you are frantically cleaning the bathrooms and kitchen so they won't be dirty when the cleaning lady shows up!!! 😂😂😂 As we say around here, "Your crazy is showing .. better tuck it back in!!!"

Jail

(2015) Funny story from today!  Dylan and Lily were playing "cops and robbers" and they had created this fort thing out of blankets, etc, that was supposed to be the "jail."  Apparently, Lily was the criminal who had been apprehended and put in the "jail."  A while later, Dylan crawled in the jail with her and I heard her say really seriously to him, "So ... What are you in for?"  I laughed out loud!!!!

British

(2013) Dylan walks through the family room tonight and asks, "Mom, why do all your shows have British people in them?"  Guess I've been watching too much PBS lately!!!

Ebola

(2014) I know the disease is not a joke, but Bran just asked me if he'd be able to skip school if he got Ebola. Nice try, Bran ... You ARE going to school tomorrow!

Buffalo

(2012) Got a huge laugh at Dylan's parent/teacher conference today!  His teacher was sharing with me a piece he had written about which Native American tribe he would like to have been part of in early America.  Dylan chose the Pawnee because "he wanted to hunt buffalo and use buffalo for his tent and clothes and he really loves eating buffalo wings."  He seriously wrote that and was dead serious!  We were cracking up!!

Ring Pop

Funny conversation in my class today after handing out a small treat that the kids had earned ...

All the kids ... “Thank you, Mrs. Taylor!!! You’re the best!!” 

Me: “We’ll it’s because you guys are the best...”

One student after taking a big lick of his Ring Pop and a long, thoughtful pause,”No ... actually you’re really a lot better than us, Mrs. Taylor.”

I completely cracked up!!I’m sure the big Ring Pop candy swayed things in my favor considerably!!!! 😂😂😂

Mom

(2017) There is one very happy 18 year old college student in Franklin Springs, GA tonight.  I got a call around 9 PM from Bran ..."Mom, we just finished baseball practice and I am starving, but the school cafeteria is closed, no one delivers here, and I have no money."  About 10 minutes later after making a phone call, I sent him a text ... "Go to the Pizza Hut at Franklin Springs Circle.  There is a large pizza and a 2 liter drink waiting for you in your name. It's paid for. Love you, Mom". Took him a half second to text back, "ON MY WAY!!!"  He may be 18, but it still makes this mom's heart happy to take care of her boy.  I don't get that chance too often anymore! ❤️

Five

Was stopped at the grocery store tonight by a GROWN MAN WITH TWO CHILDREN who said, "Mrs. Taylor!  Do you remember me?  You were my 5th grade teacher!"  AAAHHHHH!!!  I obviously was five years old when I was his teacher!!!!

No No

(2014) I am laughing sooo hard!  There is a commercial on for that hair removal product called the  "No No" and Lily said in all seriousness, "Daddy needs that." She can never understand why the guys have hair on their chests and legs and refers to it as their "fur."  Guess the "No No" would take care of their unfortunate "fur" problems!!! I cannot stop laughing!!

Skunks

Of course. I’m being eaten alive by mosquitoes sitting at quite possibly the worst field in Gwinnett County and the two men next to me are apparently professional exterminators and keep talking about how they can smell skunks all around us in the woods. Living the dream out here ...

Research

(2014) Things you hear yourself saying to a 7th grader supposedly doing his homework at the computer .... "Since when can you research biomes on Itunes?"