True and funny stories from the lighter side of raising my sons and daughter. As the Southern mama of this crew, I'm usually somewhere between "Bless your hearts!" and "Y'all act like you got some sense!" If we ever need to find our way home, we just follow the trail of red clay and glitter.
Followers
Saturday, January 12, 2019
Snuffacate
(2015) All day I've been saying that my nose is so snuffy that I can't breathe. Tonight, Lily came to me very worried and said, "Mamma, I'm scared for you to go to sleep because you might "snuff"acate." Cracked me up, but I love her concern for me!
Remix
(2010)
Just made the boys some chocolate chip muffins, which inspired Lily to entertain us with "remixesof some old favorites. Currently she is singing, "Do you know the muffin man ... his fleece was white as snow." Hee! Hee!
Just made the boys some chocolate chip muffins, which inspired Lily to entertain us with "remixesof some old favorites. Currently she is singing, "Do you know the muffin man ... his fleece was white as snow." Hee! Hee!
Sold Out
I stopped at Walgreens tonight to get Bran and Dyl's ADHD meds, and the pharmacist said, "You'll have to come back later this week because we are totally out due to the holidays." ?? I wasn't aware that Concerta was such a hot holiday gift item this year! Hahaaaa!
Flamingo
I bought shrimp at the grocery store to make for dinner one night this week. When we got the bags in the car beside Lily, she sniffed and said, "Yuck! It smells like flamingos in here!" Pretty accurate, actually! hahahaha!
Thursday, January 3, 2019
Tooth
(2010) Today's episode of LIFE WITH BOYS: As I am cleaning up the boys' messy bathroom this evening for the hundredth time, I find a TOOTH just lying on the counter. In the midst of being creeped out by that, Dylan barges in and says, "MOM! Look at my spit beard!!!" BOYS!!!!!!!!!!!
Saturday, December 29, 2018
Smoke
Life with a 15 year old son .... Skeet and I leaping out of bed at 1 AM to the smoke alarm screaming and the smell of smoke. Run downstairs to see Dylan standing guiltily over a smoking pan of burned scrambled eggs. Without blinking an eye he says, “Buddy did it.” Nice try!! I told him that the next time he needs a middle of the night snack, it should be a PBJ. 😮😂
Saturday, December 22, 2018
Scratch and Sniff
This post from this day in 2015 made me laugh out loud!
“Tonight I was reading several stories to Dylan and Lily, one of which was a book about the nativity. Dylan was super disappointed that it wasn't a "scratch and sniff" book ... WHY we would want to scratch and sniff a donkey, I just don't know!!!!”
“Tonight I was reading several stories to Dylan and Lily, one of which was a book about the nativity. Dylan was super disappointed that it wasn't a "scratch and sniff" book ... WHY we would want to scratch and sniff a donkey, I just don't know!!!!”
Wednesday, December 19, 2018
A little kindness...
I had the funniest and sweetest thing happen tonight when I stopped in Kohl’s to pick up a last-minute gift. I was super tired from a fun, but long day at school, and had been standing in a ultra long, slow line waiting to get to the cash register. Believe me when I say there were a lot of tired, grumpy people waiting in that line. When I was finally next up to be helped at the cash register, this very big, older man stepped right in front of me with two packs of Lindor chocolate truffles in his hand to purchase. I was a little surprised, but decided to be gracious and just let him go ahead, seeing that I had just read a devotional the other night that talked about “not sacrificing kindness on the altar of your impatience,” especially during the busy holiday season. (Plus I was wearing a huge Santa Claus Christmas sweater, so I couldn’t really be mean wearing that. 😂😂) I figured he must not have noticed the long line and had just made a mistake. After a few seconds standing in front of me, he turned back and looked at me questioningly, and I just smiled. Then he started laughing. What I didn’t know was that his wife was actually in line behind me, and he was just playing a joke to see how I would react if he cut in line! He said, “I’m just playing! I’m not really cutting in front of you!” I started laughing and said, “It was OK! I was going to just let you go ahead! I figured you were in a serious rush to eat those chocolates!” The whole line started laughing at this point, and the man said to me, “I was expecting you to get really mad, I was even a little nervous, but you have a beautiful spirit. I’m glad to know there still people like that in the world.” It was so sweet! When I left the store, he was sitting on a bench waiting for his wife. I waved goodbye to him and told him, “’You better be good from now on because Santa is watching!” and we laughed again. It really shows how just a little bit of kindness and grace can bring out the best in everyone, even on a late night Christmas shopping errand after a very looooong day! ❤️
Fluff
I don't want to watch any Christmas movie that is described as "a searing holiday drama” where the town has to rally to solve some gut wrenching, super depressing problem. All I want is fluff and happiness and folks dancing around and singing in a small town where it snows on the night they light the town tree and everyone is friends and someone adopts a shelter puppy then falls in love with their long lost hometown boyfriend who is a secret war hero and then gets married on Christmas Eve by a magical Santa disguised as a traveling handyman after they go ice skating and Christmas carolling and stop by the town bakery for homemade gingerbread and hot chocolate and everyone is smiling under a big glowing star at the end. As you can see, my demands are few. 😂😂
Monday, December 10, 2018
Contact
I am seriously losing it. This morning I put my contacts in and could have sworn that I put in TWO contacts. However I realized I still couldn’t see anything out of my left eye. So, I searched all around the bathroom counter and couldn’t find the contact I had obviously dropped on the counter. In a hurry to get to work, I opened a new contact and put it in my left eye. All day at school I could barely see anything, and kept wondering what in the world was wrong with my contacts! When I got home this evening and took out my contacts, I realized I could still see perfectly out of my right eye, which never happens when my contacts are out. Lo and behold, I had NOT lost a contact on the counter this morning, but had put TWO contacts in my right eye, and then a third contact in the left eye. What on earth???!! Yes, friends, I am losing it. It is indeed time for a Christmas break!!! 😂😂😂😮😮😮
Thursday, December 6, 2018
Blank
Typical Skeet/Jen conversation ...
Me, setting the table for our grade level Christmas party on Friday: “Skeet, should I use crackle glass votives in this centerpiece or pillars?”
Skeet, looking completely blank: (loooong pause) “I have no idea what any of that is ...”
😂😂😂😂 #nohelp #callmom
Me, setting the table for our grade level Christmas party on Friday: “Skeet, should I use crackle glass votives in this centerpiece or pillars?”
Skeet, looking completely blank: (loooong pause) “I have no idea what any of that is ...”
😂😂😂😂 #nohelp #callmom
Squirrel
One of my favorite Dylan moments from 8 years ago ...😂😂😂
Only Dylan! He told us this evening that he wants to quit his basketball team. Of course we said NO and gave him a big speech about making commitments and keeping them and not letting your team down, etc. We finally asked WHY he wanted to quit, thinking it was because he thought his team wasn't good or because he wanted to stay home and play video games or something. His exact words for wanting to quit were ... "Because someone on my team's breath smells like a squirrel." What?!!! How does he even know what a squirrel smellls like?!!! Dylan definitely keeps life interesting around here!!!
Only Dylan! He told us this evening that he wants to quit his basketball team. Of course we said NO and gave him a big speech about making commitments and keeping them and not letting your team down, etc. We finally asked WHY he wanted to quit, thinking it was because he thought his team wasn't good or because he wanted to stay home and play video games or something. His exact words for wanting to quit were ... "Because someone on my team's breath smells like a squirrel." What?!!! How does he even know what a squirrel smellls like?!!! Dylan definitely keeps life interesting around here!!!
Wednesday, December 5, 2018
Challenge
I have an extremely hard Christmas challenge for all of you. See if you can select the correct answer below…
A man asks a woman on a holiday date. They stop off into a closed flower shop at night to create a gorgeous floral arrangement together, at the man’s suggestion. While making this gorgeous, elaborate Christmas flower arrangement together, the man chipperly tosses flowers and bows back-and-forth to the woman, discussing his deep love for sketching and making flower arrangements. The two begin laughing and dancing around the shop to jazzy Christmas music, putting flowers in each other’s hair. The woman almost slips on a stray pine needle, but the man catches her just in time! After a long, awkward moment of bewildered staring, the mood becomes very serious and the man tells the woman that when she is near, his heart melts like marshmallows in a cup of hot chocolate.
Was this man ...
A. Robert Skeet Taylor?
B. A guy in a Hallmark movie in a script totally written by women that Jen watched tonight?
I know it’s a very difficult choice and may be a bit tricky to figure out, but just take your best shot! 😂😂😂
A man asks a woman on a holiday date. They stop off into a closed flower shop at night to create a gorgeous floral arrangement together, at the man’s suggestion. While making this gorgeous, elaborate Christmas flower arrangement together, the man chipperly tosses flowers and bows back-and-forth to the woman, discussing his deep love for sketching and making flower arrangements. The two begin laughing and dancing around the shop to jazzy Christmas music, putting flowers in each other’s hair. The woman almost slips on a stray pine needle, but the man catches her just in time! After a long, awkward moment of bewildered staring, the mood becomes very serious and the man tells the woman that when she is near, his heart melts like marshmallows in a cup of hot chocolate.
Was this man ...
A. Robert Skeet Taylor?
B. A guy in a Hallmark movie in a script totally written by women that Jen watched tonight?
I know it’s a very difficult choice and may be a bit tricky to figure out, but just take your best shot! 😂😂😂
Friday, November 30, 2018
Wedding
From when Lily was three ...
I just asked Lily to go get in her nightgown and pull up for bed and she told me she couldn't because she was busy brushing her hair for her wedding. Oh my.
I just asked Lily to go get in her nightgown and pull up for bed and she told me she couldn't because she was busy brushing her hair for her wedding. Oh my.
Sunday, November 25, 2018
Love
(2012) I love Skeet for a lot of reasons, but right now I love him because he's watching the whole movie "My Little Pony A Very Minty Christmas" with Lily Claire! She's in heaven!
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