Instant Message

Lily and I were heading to the grocery store today and got behind a driver who was going 2 miles an hour and not turning at the signal, etc. Lily and I were getting annoyed and yelling real meanly  at the driver inside our car to “hurry up” and “pay attention.” At that moment we passed at church that had a HUGE sign on its lawn that said,”Love God. Love people.”  From the backseat Lily said, “Oops. I guess God was sending us an instant message. “ 😂😂❤️ We were much nicer to fellow drivers the rest of the trip!!

Belly Button

(2010) Lily Claire calls her "belly button" her BELTY BUCKLE. She cracks me up!

Grammie and Papaw

I was sitting in with Lily and Dylan tonight as they were going to sleep and I mentioned that Grammie and Papaw would be coming over for dinner on Thursday.  Lily said, "Good cause I like Grammie and Papaw."  Then she asked Dylan if he liked Grammie and Papaw.  Dylan replied, "OF COURSE, everybody in our WHOLE family likes Grammie and Papaw ... and I think everybody in the world likes them, too."  I had to agree!

Love Germs

Buddy was very excited when we got home tonight and was licking Lily all over her face.  Skeet said, "Lily, don't let Buddy lick your face.  He has bacteria!" to which LIly replied, "Oh Dad!  Those are just LOVE germs!"

Snow Cone

I have come to the realization that without air conditioning, I would be a mean, lonely hermit with NO friends or maybe even be in JAIL.  I get SO grouchy and irritable when I'm SUPER hot!  Case in point, after Lily's cheer photos last week on a SCORCHING HOT turf football field in the dead middle of the hottest afternoon in August (and I was stupidly wearing sweat pants), Lily asked if she could have a snow cone when we were done.  OF COURSE, the snow cone truck was parked RIGHT in the sun and I was already super grouchy from sweating to death in the 100 degree afternoon sun in sweatpants!  Sweat was actually dripping down my nose, which made me SUPER grumpy and irritated!  At any rate, I begrudgingly got in the line (no shade, mind you) for a small, Coke flavored snow cone, and the lady in front me proceeds to order SIX LARGE SNOW CONES!!!  Are you kidding me?!!  THEN, she asked the guy to name ALL the sugar free flavors first before choosing.  She then sends her daughter to inquire about what flavors all the siblings want, which fluctuated about ten times from Pina Colado to Blue Raspberry! After an eternity in the boiling sun waiting for her snow cone buffet to be ready, she looks at the snow cones the man is setting on the counter for her and says she needs MORE flavor on ALL of them!!!!  THEN, she takes sample bites of each one and starts to walk away, but NOT before coming back to the window to ask for extra napkins.  I literally almost committed a snow cone FELONY at the window before that lady was finished!  THANKFULLY we got into our air conditioned car to leave and narrowly escaped my hot, angry descent into a life of crime.

Bus

Tales from Middle School ...

Lily came home today and said,”Mom, I have good news and bad news. The good news is our bus driver said he would play music on the bus!”

Me: “Cool! What’s the bad news?”

Lily: “It was Kidz Bop.”😑

Apparently they were all back in their earbuds pretty quickly. 😂😂😂

14

(2017) Lord give me strength some days to survive living with a 14 year old again ... I'm getting too old for this!!! Parenting isn't for the weak. (Of course, after a bunch of drama and arguing and yelling about cleaning his room, he slinks into my bedroom to apologize, hug me, and snuggle up with  Lily to watch TV ... and melts my heart again.)

Hot Dogs

(2011) While having our gourmet dinner of hot dogs and macaroni and cheese tonight, Lily informed us all that they weren't "hot dogs", they were "warm dogs."  :)

Browning

Hilarious exchange between Grammie and Brandon tonight ...  I call it Brandon is from Mars, Grammie is from Venus ....

Brandon:  I put a Browning sticker on the back of my new truck.
Grammie:  A brownie sticker?
Brandon:  No, BROWNING.
Grammie:  What is Browning?
Brandon:  It's like a hunting and gun brand at Bass Pro Shop.
Grammie:  (Frowning with disapproval)
Brandon:  I also put one of these stickers on it (pointing to his shirt)
Grammie:  What is that?  A bomb?!
Brandon:  Um, no ... it's the Oakley logo.
Grammie:  Oakley?!  I've never heard of that!  What do they make?!!!  Bullets?  Knives?!!
Brandon:  Sunglasses.

Heaven

(2012) I overheard Brandon and Dylan talking in their room after I had put them to bed last night ... Dylan leaned over the bunk bed and enthusiastically said, "Brandon, Heaven is going to be AWESOME!  There are going to be talking dogs and you get to play video games with Jesus!"  He then paused and thought a moment before saying, "I sure hope He knows how to play."

Melted

We took Bran to a Japanese restaurant last weekend and it reminded me of a hilarious story. When Dyl was about four, he was terrified of the big fire at the hibachi grill at our local Japanese restaurant. While the cook was preparing the grill, Dylan was happily playing with this super cheap, large plastic tiger we’d gotten at the Dollar Store. When the big fire ensued, Dyl was cringing and obviously really frightened so the cook guy was trying to reassure him and make him feel better.  To be funny, he took Dylan’s tiger and waved it through the flames saying that the fire was not scary and wouldn’t hurt him. We were all laughing and smiling during this display UNTIL he handed the big plastic tiger back to Dyl and the whole face had melted off in the flames!!! You should have seen the look on Dylan’s face!! 😂😂😂 I still laugh out LOUD remembering how shocked we all were, including the chef guy,  at the melted tiger blob he pulled from the flames! We bring it up EVERY TIME we eat Japanese food, and crack up every time!!!

Robbers

(2011) We were reading a "Dear God" book tonight before we went to bed about having a bad temper.  After the book, Dylan pondered very seriously, "Mom, God even loves robbers, though He's kind of depressed about them."  VERY true, but cracked me up!

Lobster

I was at the dollar store this evening picking up a few items for my class. A man in the store was literally yelling at the top of his lungs to his wife across the store,”THEY GOT LOBSTER EGGROLLS! THEY GOT LOBSTER EGGROLLS! THEY GOT LOBSTER EGGROLLS! “ As if that wasn’t weird enough, I couldn’t even stomach the thought of what the dollar store was passing off as “lobster” in those frozen one dollar packs of egg rolls! Sounds like a food poisoning fiasco waiting to happen… 🤢  Pretty sure eating the glue sticks I was purchasing would’ve been a safer bet than ingesting those hideous eggrolls! 😂😂😂 #lobsterimposter 🦞

Summer Reading

(2015) Why am I always 100% stressed about the boys finishing their summer reading and they are 0% stressed?!!!  I am getting the feeling that Dylan isn't being too meticulous with reading his chapters of "Who Was Neil Armstrong?" since he just informed me that Neil had two brothers named Wilbur and Orville.  Sheesh.

Whiskey

(2015) Oh dear. I may need to cut down on the country music songs in the car since Lily just informed us that at Longhorn tonight she was going to order "whisky."  We couldn't stop laughing, and she had no idea what it was!!!