Medicine

This would be why I don’t take cold or allergy medicine before bedtime. Last night I dreamed that we had a pet lion in our backyard that had wandered in from the highway. I was concerned if the lion would get along with Buddy and the big group of gorillas we already had living in the backyard.  I also wasn’t sure if I was feeding the lion enough dog food every day and kept pouring huge mixing bowls full of it outside. We eventually let the lion into our kitchen to drink water out of a huge basin and let it lay on the floor and wander around the house roaring. Our neighbors then rented a petting zoo for one of their kid’s birthday parties and the owners asked if they could have the lion as part of their petting zoo. I agreed because I was worried the dog food for the lion was too expensive,but in the dream I was crying the whole time the lion was being put into a crate to leave with the petting zoo people. I kept telling the petting zoo people to take care of my lion and to remember that he was a boy lion named Joseph, but they wouldn’t listen to me. I kept trying to pet the lion one last time before the truck left. It was soooo bizarre and distressing! DEFINITELY going to stay away from the meds tonight before bed!!! 🦁🦁🦁

Storm

(2018) Life with Brandon Taylor ... I called him today to check in on him since his school is closed the next two days. Our conversation ...
Me: Hi Bran! Are you coming home because of the storm?
Bran: No, I'm staying here.
Me: Well do you have a plan for bad weather? A safe place you can go if the wind gets bad?
Bran: Yeah, I'm ready.
Me: Are you sure? You know the winds are supposed to be really, really strong. What is your plan? How exactly have you gotten ready?
Bran: I bought a kite ...

Yep ... that's Brandon.  😂😂😂

Old Timer

(2015) Lily just said, "Mom, remember in the old, old, old times when everyone had to wear a beard?  Well Daddy must have looked HORRIBLE!"  Sorry Robert Skeet Taylor, but I am cracking up, you old timer, you!!

Fruit Loops

(2013) Dylan was trying to entice Lily to come upstairs to play this morning.  When she wouldn't come, he made a trail of her favorite cereal, Fruit Loops, that went from the family room and up the stairs to her room for her to follow/eat her way upstairs.  It worked!!

16

Driving down some country back roads on my way to Callaway Gardens ... Windows down, sun shining, listening to some old Chicago 17 and 18 ... for a brief while I felt 16 again.

Cheese Straws

You know you’re in the South when the focal point for all spoken directions of the day starts with, “Well first take a right at the cheese straw stand...”  #yellowdaisyfestival #goodtimes

Sealed

(2012) Brandon just asked me how well Obama did in college.  I said nobody knows because his records are sealed.  Bran replied, "I wish MY school records could be sealed."  Cracked me up!!!

Tomatoes and Dogs

Last night I watched an old movie and the men kept referring to all the women as "tomatoes" and "dogs"!!! One guy even told a girl she wasn't as much of a dog as she thought she was, and apparently that was a compliment!  Then, the guy's mom, who had a gray bun, glasses,and knitted in a rocking chair the whole movie, was worried that her son would kick her out of the family home when he got married because she was so old.  She then revealed that she was 50!! What??!!!! Hahahaaaa!!!

Homework

Lily was sitting on the couch reading a history article for school about cattle drives.  Out of nowhere, Buddy leaped up and tore off a hunk of the article paper and ate it!! We are in hysterics because we just witnessed a dog ACTUALLY eating homework!!! 😂😂😂

Illegal

Dear Middle School teachers,
Please excuse my daughter if she was extremely sleepy in your classes today. Apparently she stayed up half the night writing an impassioned essay entitled “Why School Should Be Illegal.” 😂😂😂 (true story, folks)

Rainbow

(2010) A scary glimpse into the minds of seven year old boys: At the drugstore, I let Dylan pick out some candy.  He picked out this HUGE multicolored lollipop, of course.  He said, "Mom, I bet I'll be the first person EVER to be able to eat all this at once."  I replied,"If you do, you'll get sick."  He thought a moment and replied cheerfully, "Well, if I throw up, at least it will be rainbow!"   UG!!

Bob the Blob

So what does one do when a student spills red juice on your classroom floor that won't come off, no matter how much the custodian tried?  You turn it into "Bob the Blob," our new beloved classroom friend!  Hahahahaa!  Like we say in my classroom, "I'm not weird, I'm gifted!" (Ok, maybe I'm a little weird, too! Hahahaaaa!)

BEEP

(2012) Failed parenting lesson of the evening ...
I walk in the office and Dylan is sitting at the computer listening to some rap song from pro wrestling.  It doesn't sound very "appropriate" so I come over to disapprove and decide to use the moment to teach a sobering life lesson (or so I think).
Me:  Dylan, would you feel ok about listening to that song if God was sitting right next to you?
Dylan: (dead serious)  Yeah   I think God would be okay with this version, Mom, because whenever they say a cuss word in the song it says "BEEP" instead!
Me: Ummm, ok ... no.  You and God aren't going to listen to this song anymore.
I sure hope God has a very good sense of humor!!!!!

Gray Flannel

I was getting Skeet a new bottle of his cologne that I like called Gray Flannel and this was seriously what it said on the product description ... "Launched by the design house of Geoffrey Beene in 1976, Grey Flannel for Men is recommended for romantic use."  Hahahahaaa!!!  I'll be sure Skeet reads those directions ... I'll be expecting a romantic dinner for two and some roses once he sprays some on!!

Lip

I hate when I go to get my eyebrows done, as I did today, and the lady asks, "Your lip? your lip?" meaning, do I want my upper lip waxed. I always say "no thank you" and then the lady shakes her head and looks at me with shock and despair like she's looking at some huge, shaggy mustache on my face!  It makes me so paranoid!!!  Here's how I think I look and then how the waxing lady makes me THINK I look leaving the shop!!!!