Hunk

(2013) Lily was describing Robert Skeet Taylor at lunch: "a person with black white gray hair, wrinkly forehead, hairy arms, and a scratchy face." WHAT A HUNK!!  I am laughing soooo hard!!! 😂😂😂

Golf

Conversations I had with Skeet on the golf course today… He’s such a lucky man to have me by his side!! 😂😂😂 Wonder if he’ll invite me again soon?

“It’s humid out here”
“Uh oh. I hope you brought a lot of balls.”
“That lake is like a putt putt trap.”
“I’m going to watch from the shade.”
“Aww! Look at that cute dog!”
“I am going to look this tree up on plant app ...”
“I need a drink.”
“Somebody left tees everywhere.”
“They need to empty the trash out here.”
“Why are you using that club?”
“I’m sweating.”
“The woods are lovely, dark, and deep...”
“Woah! Look where this ball is. Somebody did terrible.”
“ I wonder who designs the shape of the sand traps.”
“Don’t get poison ivy getting your ball.”
“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood...”
“Maybe you should’ve brought your glasses.”
“What’s with all the ant hills?”
“Hold on. My tennis shoe hurts.”
“This is a no judgement zone.”
“That dude must be burning up in that long sleeve shirt.”
“Oops. It’s ok. Try again.”
“Look at all the dandelions!”
“Wow. We look super white in these shorts. We need a tan.”
“Are there fish in this lake? I just saw bubbles!”
“Don’t hit that guy over there.”
“They should make golf balls out of stuff that fish can eat for when they go in the lake.”
“Should I stop keeping score?”

Termites

So the termite exterminators come at the crack of dawn this morning (the yearly check, we don't actually have termites) ... I thought they would just spray some stuff and leave us our letter.  Of course not!  The man gives me a long speech about the option to have them drill into the basement floor and into all the outside bricks and the front porch with their jack hammer and how "it might look bad at first but it'll settle down after a while."  Oh yeah and also the holes could cause some "flooding problems. Do I want him to do that?"  Um ... NO!!!  What on earth? Just squirt some spray, mister!!!!

Job

(2011) Another Dylan moment ... I was laying in his bed with him before he fell asleep and he asked, "Mom, when you grow up do you have to have a job?"  Of course, I said, "Yes, if you want to have a house and food!"  Dylan thought a moment then said, "Yea, and if you don't have a job you'd be drunk all the time and have a fat stomach."  WHERE does he get this stuff?!  He cracks me up!

Praise

One of my sweet fourth grade boys said to me today, "Mrs. Taylor, the only better woman in my life other than you is my mother."  Absolutely precious. I don't think there is any higher praise possible than that!

Work Force

(2015) There is seriously something wrong with today's work force. At his request, I bought Bran a "virtual" gift card to Burger King from their own webpage so he could drive through and get some breakfast on his way to school. This was in February. He hasn't been able to use it yet because every time he goes there, the workers say they don't know how to use it. On the paper itself it says exactly what the worker needs to do to enter it into the cash register!  At any rate, I stopped by to finally work it all out yesterday and the teenage worker told me,  "You can't use that here because nothing from the Burger King website or apps works in our store.  You can only use it online."  Huh?  I shouldn't have, but I replied, "That's really odd. So you're saying I need to order a Whopper and fries online with this gift card and have it shipped to me?"
Guess what the worker answered?....  "Yes."
Good grief. I just gave up at that point!! Guess I'll be making a call to their corporate offices ... Or I'll just order up a bunch of burgers tonight online for UPS to deliver in 3-5 business days.

Lucky

(2015) What a super lucky mom I am! Dyl and his friends used a big stick to drag this dead snake from two streets down all the way to our driveway so I could see it. They were so proud of themselves, all I could do was choke out a weak, "Wow guys" before encouraging them to drag it off somewhere else! 🤢🤢🤢😂😂 #parentingboysnotfortheweak

Classy

A girl on Say Yes to the Dress just said she wants a sexy dress so she can "booty pop" at her wedding.  Wow .... Classy.

Laundry

Seriously considering burning all the dirty laundry in a bonfire in the backyard rathering than doing it all today!  No one would notice a twenty foot burning pile of cloth in my backyard, would they?!!!

Gerbil

(2013) Lily just asked me if she could have a JEWEL-BALL.  ????  Finally realized she was trying to say GERBIL!  I think the Jewel-Ball is a better option.

Heaven

Wow ... Perfect "almost summer" evening in Georgia. Taking a walk alone ... 63 degrees, breeze blowing, the sun almost ready to dip down for the night...  honeysuckle in the air and Rascal Flatts humming in my ear ... pure heaven for this Southern girl.

Lipstick

(2013)
 So I delivered some news to Lily Claire last night that was followed by ten minutes of uproarious squealing, jumping, twirling, and clapping with delight.  Did I tell her we had won the lottery?!  No.  Did I tell her we were going to Disney World?!  No.  Did I tell her she could wear pink lipstick to her ballet recital tonight?  Yes!  It was a major lipstick celebration at our house.  :)

Criticizing

Irony: I’m watching a survival show with Skeet and I’m sitting here harshly criticizing this lady for complaining and refusing to eat a big slimy stingray they caught with a spear. Then I remember that I won’t even eat at Waffle House. 😂😂😂😂😂😂

Cure

(2012) You gotta love 3rd grade baseball ... it was super hot at the field, one kid overheated, one kid broke his thumb, the team lost .... but the coaches took them to Dairy Queen after the game so all was right with the world!  Apparently, a chocolate dipped ice cream cone is the best cure for just about anything when you're 8 years old!

Cough

(2012)  Lily kept coughing tonight so I told her I needed to give her some cough medicine.  She thought a minute and said, "No Mom, I need some NOT cough medicine."  Good point, actually!!!