Punch

 (2012) Lily Claire just told me that if I don't wear green today, a leprechaun will PUNCH me! I said, "No, he won't!  That's not nice!"  Lily Claire insisted that's what her teacher said!  Then it dawned on me she meant the leprechaun would PINCH me! For a minute, I thought we had an violent leprechaun running around here somewhere!  :)

BSOL

 Those of you who know me are aware that I'm not really known for having extensive baseball knowledge (ok, none), and I've been known to erroneously scream "good cut" from time to time when Bran catches a ball in the outfield. I basically sit at the games asking Skeet "What happened?" after each play  and just clap for whatever Bran does. HOWEVER, I was never fully aware of my complete and utter lack of baseball knowledge until the other evening Brandon Taylor and Robert Skeet Taylor were on either side of me  rehashing a recent game. Believe me when I say that they talked for over twenty minutes saying stuff I'd never even heard of IN MY LIFE that apparently did or didn't happen in the game. Y'all, I literally had NO IDEA what they were even saying! It was like a weird, secret "man code" that I'd never been privy to until now!

Here's what the conversation sounded like to me ..., "The southpaw dinger brushback pickle set-up-man with the seeing-eye-single shoestring catch in the hole flashed some leather on the hot corner who had a safety squeeze on a sacrifice bunt with a slice foul sinker in the backdoor breaking ball bad hop balk for the closer in the clutch and the mop up with the BABIP ERA WHIP, don't you agree?"

Ummmm .... yes??  .... 

I've now decided that instead of being ESOL, (English as a Second or Other Language), I am what you would call BSOL,.. (BASEBALL as a Second or Other Language).  And after hearing all their jibberish, it will be a PERMANENT condition for me, I am quite sure. Unless maybe there is some Rosetta Stone software that could help me out. 🙂  #lifewiththeTaylormen

Birthday

 (2011) Just had a FUN birthday dinner with my family at the Japanese restaurant ... cracking up because after spend the night parties and a baseball car wash this weekend, both my boys pretty much slept through the whole thing!!!

DMV

 My dad took a friend of ours from church to renew his license at the DMV.  They walked in and not a SOUL was in the place (how lucky!)  The walked up to the counter and said they needed to renew.  Now, mind you, NO ONE was there but them.  The lady said, "I'm sorry, You have to take a number."  Laughing, they went over and pulled a number, number 12, and then returned to the lady.  The lady then said, "I'm sorry.  You'll have to be seated until your number is called."  THERE WAS NO ONE ELSE THERE!  As soon as they sat down in the waiting area, the lady caled out, "Number 12." They took their number to her at that point and THEN she proceeded to help them renew.  I was cracking up envisioning this scene ... it's like something from the Carol Burnett show!  

Advice

 Today's free springtime advice .... never coat all your birdseed with "Coles Flaming Squirrel Repellant Sauce" and then hang your feeder from a very high branch on a super windy day.  Though it sounds unlikely, a big piece of flaming seed WILL fall out of the feeder right into your eye.  Unfortunately I am speaking from painful experience.

Snow Day

 Another installment of “Jen and Skeet are complete opposites.”

SNOW DAY 

Snow pouring outside. 

Skeet: I think I’m going to get the laundry done, go for a brisk walk, then go to the gym for a long workout!

Jen: I think I’m going to wrap another fuzzy blanket around my head and sit by the fire with Buddy and my massive mug of hot chocolate with whipped cream and eat another biscuit.”

We both successfully completed our goals for the day!😂😂😂 

Bedtime

 (2015) It's about two minutes before bedtime and Lily asks me if she could tell me just one more quick thing before bed. 

"Sure," I said sleepily. "What is it?"

"Will you listen to my top 100 laughs and tell me which is the best one?"

Ummm ... no, Lil. Let's save that for your next spend the night with Grammie!! 

Mirror

 (2011) Found Lily Claire singing and dancing and talking in front of my full length mirror in the bathroom.  When I asked her what she was doing, she pointed to herself in the mirror and said, "Playing with this new friend!"  She's definitely MY girl!

Cinderella

 (2013) Lily Claire just said to me, "Mom, you are just like Cinderella." As I was basking in the glow of such a sweet, heartfelt compliment thinking maybe I had Cinderella's beauty, or grace, or kindness, I replied, "Oh how sweet!  How is Mommy like Cinderella?"  Lily answered, "Because you clean all day."

Cherry Day

 (2015) Lily Claire and I went outside a minute ago and she sighed and said, "Well, it's another cherry day."

"What?"  I asked.  "What is a cherry day?"

"The last time it looked like this outside, you said it was a cherry day," Lil answered.

Thinking a minute, I realized, "Not a CHERRY day, Lil!  I said it was a DREARY day!"

Hee! Hee!  I think we may call it a "cherry" day from now on ... that certainly sounds happier!

Witch

 (2015) Lily hugged me last night and said, "Mommy, sometimes you are just like a nice witch."  Huh?!  Is that good?!

Tired

 A favorite! 😂😂😂

There is no tired like the tired of an elementary school teacher at the end of the week before Christmas break! As we were dragging home late tonight from school, we passed by our neighbor's nativity scene out in their yard.  I noticed that Mary wasn't lit up as usual, and I turned to Lily and said, "Uh oh. Mary is burned out."  After considering that for a minute, I yelled out the window at plastic Mary, "GIRL, I CAN RELATE!!"  I was cracking myself up, but Lily was looking at me like I'd truly gone off my rocker!  Actually, I think I have!!!  Hahahaaaaa!!!

Christmas

 I had the funniest and sweetest thing happen tonight when I stopped in Kohl’s to pick up a last-minute gift. I was super tired from a fun, but long day at school, and had been standing in a ultra long, slow line waiting to get to the cash register.  Believe me when I say there were a lot of tired, grumpy people waiting in that line. When I was finally next up to be helped at the cash register, this very big, older man stepped right in front of me with two packs of Lindor chocolate truffles in his hand to purchase. I was a little surprised, but decided to be gracious and just let him go ahead, seeing that I had just read a devotional the other night that talked about “not sacrificing kindness on the altar of your impatience,” especially during the busy holiday season. (Plus I was wearing a huge Santa Claus Christmas sweater, so I couldn’t really be mean wearing that. 😂😂) I figured he must not have noticed the long line and had just made a mistake. After a few seconds standing in front of me, he turned back and looked at me questioningly, and I just smiled. Then he started laughing. What I didn’t know was that his wife was actually in line behind me, and he was just playing a joke to see how I would react if he cut in line! He said, “I’m just playing! I’m not really cutting in front of you!” I started laughing and said,  “It was OK! I was going to just let you go ahead! I figured you were in a serious rush to eat those chocolates!” The whole line started laughing at this point, and the man said to me, “I was expecting you to get really mad, I was even a little nervous, but you have a beautiful spirit. I’m glad to know there still people like that in the world.”  It was so sweet! When I left the store, he was sitting on a bench waiting for his wife. I waved goodbye to him and told him, “’You better be good from now on because Santa is watching!” and we laughed again. It really shows how just a little bit of kindness and grace can bring out the best in everyone, even on a late night Christmas shopping errand after a very looooong day! ❤️

Quit

(2013) Only Dylan!  He told us this evening that he wants to quit his basketball team.  Of course we said NO and gave him a big speech about making commitments and keeping them and not letting your team down, etc.  We finally asked WHY he wanted to quit, thinking it was because he thought his team wasn't good or because he wanted to stay home and play video games or something.  His exact words for wanting to quit were ... "Because someone on my team's breath smells like a squirrel."  What?!!!  How does he even know what a squirrel smellls like?!!!  Dylan definitely keeps life interesting around here!!!

Blank

Typical Skeet/Jen conversation ...

Me, setting the table for our grade level Christmas party on Friday: “Skeet, should I use crackle glass votives in this centerpiece or pillars?”

Skeet, looking completely blank: (loooong pause) “I have no idea what any of that  is ...”

😂😂😂😂 #nohelp #callmom