Relish

 (2019) Lily and I were at Kroger yesterday, and I was buying some egg salad at the deli. I said to Lily that I hoped it didn’t have relish in it because I don’t like relish.

Lily: What’s relish?

Me: It’s sort of like chopped up pickles. I don’t like it. 

Lily: Oh! It’s what Papaw puts on his hot dogs!

Me: Yes!

Lily: No, I don’t like relish. And I don’t like hot dogs either! 

Me: You don’t like hot dogs??

Lily: No. Well ... I guess if it was the Great Depression I’d eat one, but otherwise no. 

😂😂😂😂 Ok! Good to know we have our Great Depression plan in place!!

🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭

Dry Clean

 (2013) Embarrassing moment of the day:  I took some clothes from our trip to the dry cleaners and obviously had not done a good job of sorting out the clothes in my suitcase when we got back.  Case in point:  after I dropped off the clothes to be cleaned, the nice, Indian dry cleaner man chased me down in the parking lot to return a pair of my underwear and a bra I had mixed in with the dry cleaning.  Nice.

Cute

My 14 year old daughter just very politely and diplomatically asked if I could wear a “cute outfit” to her high school registration on Thursday instead of, in her words, “what you usually wear around the house.” 😂😂😂 

I’m not recalling the boys ever asking that!! 😂😂

 #girls #shouldibeinsulted

Adored

 I am one lucky gal to come home EVERY evening after all these years and be COMPLETELY idolized and adored and smothered with undying love and kisses; to have a best friend who NEVER leaves my side, loves and appreciates everything I cook for dinner (even if it’s reheated McDonald’s chicken nuggets from lunch), hangs on my every word, AND watches Hallmark movies with me without EVER complaining or changing the channel to ESPN ... yes, indeed, you are the BEST puppy ever, Buddy Taylor!! (What? You thought I was talking about someone else???Robert Skeet Taylor 😂😂😂)

Rushing

 (2016) Got tickled today at Walmart observing a teenage worker who was moving so slowly that I was concerned if she even had a pulse!  When we encountered her again in the store, I noticed her t-shirt said "Rushing Toward Success." It's going to be a long, long journey at that pace!!! Hahahaaaa!!!

Citizen’s Arrest

 (2014) We bought a special promo cup for Brandon at RaceTrac that you can refill through August 1st for free every time you are there.  Today he drove past there and went in to fill his cup and leave.  Some older man (another customer) chased him out of the store screaming, "Hey!  Hey!  You didn't pay for that drink!!!  Come back and pay!!!"  Bran turned around and said, "It's a promo cup you can refill for free."  The guy said, "Oh." and went back in the store.  Guess it was a Mango Slushie Citizen's Arrest of some sort!  Sheesh! :)

4th of July

 (2011) Lily Claire, age 3, was looking at all the 4th of July decorations for our cookout tonight and asked, "Mommy, who's birthday is it?"  Thinking I was being clever, I said, "It's America's birthday today!"  Lily thought a minute then asked, "So when is America coming over?"  Oh well.

Elvis

(2015)  OH NO!!!!  Major unfortunate event for today... I was coloring my hair (NOT that I need to cover some gray or anything) and AFTER the 30 minute wait and rinse, I realized I had picked up DARK BROWN at the store instead of DARK BLOND!!!  My hair is now darker than my sisters and I am in shock.  I wondered why it looked black when I got out of the shower!!! Robert Skeet Taylor, please brace yourself when you get home!!!  I am going to have to go get a highlighting kit PRONTO at some remote shopping area where I won't be noticed, except maybe by an Elvis talent scout!  Good lord.

Jerky

 (2018) Brandon Taylor... this still makes me laugh!!! 😂😂😂

(2016) Brandon made me laugh out loud today at Walmart!  He was begging me to buy him some $6 bag of Beef Jerky and I happened to spot a $1 bag of "Great Value" brand Beef Jerky instead. (FYI, I almost ALWAYS buy store brands.)  "Mom!" he groaned with disdain, "That is probably made from giraffe meat."  .... We bought the $6 bag to be safe.  Hahahahahaha!!!!!

Grandma

 (2020) Funny memory ... 😂😂😲😲

We were at Chili’s tonight and the young waitress looked at Skeet and said, “Here’s your ribs, sir.” Then she looked at Lily and said, “And here’s your chicken pasta.” Then she put my plate in front of me and sweetly said, “And here’s fajitas for grandma.”  What?! Seriously? #thisreallyhappened #NOtip  😧😂

Barter

(2019) I am cracking up at the brother-sister barter system going on in the Taylor house! Dylan just offered Lily $3 to make him 4 grilled cheese sandwiches. Lily raised it to $4 and a deal was struck! (The only thing Lily failed to tell Dylan was that Buddy accidentally licked all his sandwiches before she delivered them… She was afraid he wouldn’t pay the full price if he knew!) 😂😂😂

Teeth

 (2015) My Lily makes me laugh so much!!  She was mad when she realized she couldn't learn to whistle without her two front teeth, so the next thing I know, she had made some front teeth out of paper and taped them on!! I love this funny little girl!

Yes to the Dreas

 (2013) WE SAID YES TO THE DRESS!!!!!!! ... at Toys R Us, that is! Lily spent her birthday gift card on this Cinderella princess bride gown! (Note the pink and yellow PJs underneath this super elegant gown!)  When we put the veil on, Lily said "I LOOOOVE this bride hair!"

Blonde

(2013) Lily had us so confused today, and it was hilarious!  She kept mumbling things and when someone couldn't hear her, she'd say, "Oh no.  You're blonde."  What?!  Finally I asked her what that meant and she said, "Being blonde means you can't see!"  Hmmm .. that's "blind" and you meant "deaf," Lil.  Comedy of errors!

Inspirational

 (2017) Funniest texts of the day between Brandon and me! He's loving working for a remodeler/landscaper this summer, but today's job was SUPER tough. He had to remove a large privacy fence with a crowbar and his hands! Then he had to try and dig the cemented posts out of the ground! He was dead tired when he sent me this text. My attempt to be motivational didn't quite have the inspirational effect I had hoped!! 😂😂😂 I am still laughing!!