Faulty

(2014) The faulty brain waves of sixteen year old boys, as evidenced by my conversation with Bran in the truck tonight ...
Me:  We're going to have a Fourth of July party at our house.
Bran:  When?

Beef Jerky

(2016) Brandon Taylor made me laugh out loud today at Walmart!  He was begging me to buy him some $6 bag of Beef Jerky and I happened to spot a $1 bag of "Great Value" brand Beef Jerky instead. (FYI, I almost ALWAYS buy store brands.)  "Mom!" he groaned with disdain, "That is probably made from giraffe meat."  .... We bought the $6 bag to be safe.  Hahahahahaha!!!!!

Grandma

We were at Chili’s tonight and the young waitress looked at Skeet and said, “Here’s your ribs, sir.” Then she looked at Lily and said, “And here’s your chicken pasta.” Then she put my plate in front of me and sweetly said, “And here’s fajitas for grandma.”  What?! Seriously? #thisreallyhappened #NOtip  😧😂

Jesus

(2014) A little theology with Lily on the ride home today ... her questions ...
Does God ever spill anything?
If God gets thirsty and has to go get a drink, is He still watching you?
Are there roller skates in heaven?
Does Jesus eat steak?

Hmmmm ... good questions!  I think my answers were no, yes, yes, and yes.  I mean, is it really heaven without steak and roller skaters??  I think not!

Errands

Robert Skeet Taylor and I were running errands today and we pulled into PGA Golf store.
"Come in with me," he said. "There's LOTS of cool stuff to look at in here!"
After approximately three minutes inside the store I realized I had been a victim of fake news. 😂😂😂

102

(2014) Remember that I mentioned that it is 102 degrees here in Myrtle Beach?  I just discovered that Lily left a half eaten Hershey bar in the back seat of my car two days ago ....

Fireflies

Wow! My backyard is twinkling and shimmering with oodles of fireflies! #southernsummernight❤️

Date

(2014) Bran has a movie date tonight with a very sweet girl from school. A glimpse into a mother/teenage son conversation in the car today ...
Me: What time is the movie?
Bran: Seven. Can we pick her up in my truck?
Me:  Sure. Do you have money?
Bran: A little but did you know it's SIXTEEN DOLLARS for popcorn and stuff??!!!!
Me: I'll buy the tickets so you can buy her some popcorn     ...
Me again: and be sure and take a shower before you go ...
Me again: AND put on deodorant ....
Me again: and fix your hair so it won't look weird from your baseball hat ...
Bran: (giving me bad looks more frequently now)
Me again: and don't wear a tank top ,,,
Bran: (wishing he could jump out of the moving vehicle he's stuck in with me)  ...
Me again: and ..
Bran:  (with great disdain and eye rolling) MOM!! Ok!!!!! I'm good!!!! Duh!!  I'm not going to wear a TANK TOP!!!!!!!
Me:  I just had to check to make sure that wasn't in your realm of possibility.
Bran: Defeated sigh.
The moral of this tale:  All women of the free world should forever be grateful to the mothers of malekind that they have money to pay for popcorn, they do not stink or have smashed up hat hair, and they do NOT show up in raggedy Bob Marley tank tops on said dates. You are welcome.

Stuck

(2012) After I took Bran to his double header an hour early in Loganville today, I was going to be "super fun mom" and take Dylan and Lily to this McDonalds nearby to eat and play in the playground thing (I usually say NO when they want to do that!).  Of course, Lily got STUCK in the top of the playground that went TO THE CEILING and I had to CLIMB through all the tubes to get her down!!!!  I could barely fit in the tubes and my knees kept creaking and cracking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Nice.  I ran in to some little kid in one of the tubes and she said, "Why are YOU in here?"  GOOD QUESTION, KID! I guess there is a reason why 42 year olds don't have 4 year olds!!!!

Epic

(2014) Eleven year old boys crack me up!  Dyl has three neighborhood friends over for an impromptu sleep over and they are playing video games, playing with old plastic wrestlers from eBay, and eating hamburger helper on paper plates.  I just heard one of the boys say, "This sleepover is EPIC!  The best one EVER!"  AND, apparently, my trash can lid that opens and closes by itself is "SICK" ... which is a HUGE compliment in "boy world!"  Please don't be jealous, other moms, of how awesome I am.  Hahahaaaaa!!!

Fifteen

(2018) Five fifteen year old boys + four pizzas + ten Gatorades + one basketball = summertime at the Taylor house ❤️🙂☀️🍕🏀

Success

(2014) Bran was a smashing success as a babysitter for Lily tonight!  They watched Spongebob, ate fettuccine noodles that Bran made, and caught lightning bugs in a jar.  Lily had a blast!  Good job Bran!

Snippets

(2014)
Conversations with Lily are always interesting!  A few snippets from today as we were running errands ...
"Does Jesus drink Coke?
Then inside a store, "I'll push the cart Mama, since you're a little bit old."
"I wish God was a girl .. that'd be better."
And, after we saw a funeral procession with a white hearse with flashing lights, "OH MY GOSH!!!  A PRINCESS IS IN TOWN!!"

Babysit

(2015) Bran is babysitting LIly for me tonight for the first time while I go with Skeet to a business dinner.  When we were in the car, I told him, "Bran, you'll get paid $5 an hour for babysitting tonight." From the backseat Lily said, "So Bran has to pay me $5 to babysit me?"  Not quite, Lily!!

Teenagers

During the summer months, a lot of teenagers are working at the stores and fast food restaurants (my son included), which can sometimes lead to some pretty funny experiences. (To get the full effect here, you have to make the teenager voice below sound like a sort-of clueless surfer dude ...) ANYWAY, the other day, Papaw drove through Sonic to get a large strawberry limeade drink, and after he ordered, the teenage worker piped through the speaker asking, "So ... would you like ketchup and mustard with that, sir?"  Ummm .. no thanks.  Trying to cut back on the ketchup on my limeades these days.   THEN, Bran and I drove through Sonic a few days later and ordered a "vanilla ice cream with hot fudge."  The teenager voice came back through the speaker, "So ... like ... that will be one diet coke with hot fudge?"  Ummm ... no.  We don't usually get hot fudge ON our diet coke.  We were CRACKING up!  Keep up the good work, teenagers!  Feeling real confident about ALL of our futures with you guys next up to run the world.  :)