Finery

 (2013) Ladies ... ladies ... PLEASE restrain yourselves ... not everyone can have such beautiful Dollar Store jewels like us.  Maybe one day YOUR ship will come in and you, too, can have such finery ...

Pretty

 (2016)  So the lady doing my nails at the Nail Shop says to me, "You have beautiful skin! Don't need makeup!" While I'm still basking in the glow of this generous compliment, she adds, "I bet you very pretty when you were young."  Ummmm ... thanks????  I am desperately hoping something was lost in the translation!! 

Real

 (2014) Lily got to choose an item from the dollar store for filling her "teeth brushing" chart for two weeks, so she chose this GORGEOUS fake long hair!  She said, "EVERYONE, except God, will think it's REAL!" 😃

Glamorous

 (2020) A glimpse into the glamorous life at the Taylor home. I was searching all day for a missing sock from the laundry ... And found it when Buddy threw it up on my bed at 2 AM. 😑😑😑#livingthedream  #mydogisagoat 😂😂😂

Annoying

 (2012) Skeet, Bran, Dylan, Lily and I were in the car this evening heading to a restaurant.  Here is the conversation between Lily and Dylan ...

Dylan: (making all sorts of weird faces and noises)

Lilyl:  Dylan STOP!!!

Dylan: (continues making all sorts of werid faces and noises)

Lilyl:  Dylan, STOP IT!  You are being annoying!

Dylan: (still making all sorts of weird faces and noises)

Lilly: STOP DYLAN!  EVERYONE THINKS YOU'RE ANNOYING!

Long pause ...

Dylan: Grammie doesn't. (Then Dylan continues with weird faces and noises.)

Cracked me up because it's SO true!

Bacteria

 (2016) Lily just informed me that she would NEVER kiss anyone NOT in our family because if you go on a date, it's a complete stranger and he could have a LOT of "bacteria."  A true romantic in the making ... 😂😂😂😂

Exhausted

(2016)  I hope my family appreciates the blood, sweat, and tears I put into slaving over a hot stove for their supper tonight!  They wanted soup and sandwiches, so I opened SEVERAL pop-top cans of tomato soup BY MYSELF, then lovingly wrapped each grilled cheese sandwich in Sonic takeout foil. I am EXHAUSTED. (That's my story and I'm sticking to it ...😂😂😂😂). #bestmomever.

Sleeping Beauty

 (2011) Dylan is laughing his head off because Lily Claire is playing with her princess dolls and keeps calling Sleeping Beauty "Sleeping Booty."  Oh dear!

Slime

 (2018) Lily just proudly showed me some huge blob of slime she made and then I realized she was carrying it around on top of her children's Bible!! What?!!

Me: "SLIME on your Bible, Lil? Really?!

Lily: GASP!!! Oops!!!! 

Me: I'm calling Jesus right now to tell on you. 

Lily: (running to get it off) Nooooooooo!!! I'm sorry, Jesus!!!!!

😂😂😂😂

Hives

 (2020) When you’re itching and  think you have hives from all the stress you’ve been under and then you realize it was just a bunch of crumbled Pringles that fell down your blouse at lunch… #teacherlife2020

Remember

 (2011) Life with a 13 year old son:  On my way home this evening, I called Bran to remind him to get his homework and chores done.  Typically, Bran never "remembers" to do any of his chores without lots of "reminders." So I say, "Bran, don't forget to take down the trashcans from the curb before football practice."  To which he replies, totally seriously, "I already did it, Mom, because you know ... I'm just cool like that."  Uh huh ... we'll see how long this wave of "coolness" lasts!  :)

Kitty Cat

 (2011) Saturday, I made the mistake of shopping early for Lily's Halloween costume online and she ended up picking out a sweet kitty cat costume.  HOWEVER, now she is asking me every day if I can draw whiskers on her face and put on her costume (which, of course, we don't have yet!)  She just came storming into my room huffing and said, "WHEN is Halloween?  I've been waiting and waiting!"  Oh dear.  October is going to be a loooooooooong month! 

Wrong

 If watching Hallmark channel and eating Little Debbies on the couch in my pajamas is wrong, then I don’t want to be right.😂😂😂

Grooming

 I just got an offer from a pet website to send me a 128 page book about grooming my dog at home. What on earth?!!! All I do for Buddy is slop some dog shampoo and water on him in the tub then brush him. Buddy must be missing out on the other 127 pages of grooming! 😂😂🐾🐾

Kite

(2017) Life with Brandon Taylor ... I called him today to check in on him since his school is closed the next two days. Our conversation ...

Me: Hi Bran! Are you coming home because of the storm?

Bran: No, I'm staying here. 

Me: Well do you have a plan for bad weather? A safe place you can go if the wind gets bad?

Bran: Yeah, I'm ready. 

Me: Are you sure? You know the winds are supposed to be really, really strong. What is your plan? How exactly have you gotten ready?

Bran: I bought a kite ... 

Yep ... that's Brandon.  😂😂😂