True and funny stories from the lighter side of raising my sons and daughter. As the Southern mama of this crew, I'm usually somewhere between "Bless your hearts!" and "Y'all act like you got some sense!" If we ever need to find our way home, we just follow the trail of red clay and glitter.
Followers
Wednesday, October 10, 2018
Grits
(2011) I have succeeded in raising my kids as true Southerners! I told Lily I was going to go order pizza for supper and she said, "No, Mom, let's order grits!" That's my girl!
Tater Tots
I am amazed at the apparent rapid rate of tater tot evaporation ... Anytime I send Brandon Taylor to Sonic to get some for me, half the pack is somehow gone by the time it gets home to me!!!!! Hmmmmmm...... :)
Tuesday, October 9, 2018
Girl Cheese
(2011) Grammie and Papaw came over tonight for homemade chili and to watch a movie. I was asking everyone if they wanted a "grilled" cheese sandwich with their chili and Lily shouted, "YES! I want a "girl" cheese sandwich!" Papaw laughed and said, "I want a "girl" cheese sandwich, too!" Lilly put her hands on her hips and said, "No Papaw, you have to have a BOY cheese sandwich!"
Old School
I am an old school elementary school teacher and proud of it! I am pleased to say that tonight I rummaged out my "candy corn" earrings and my pumpkin vest for the upcoming season! Now all I need to find are those cute socks with ghosts and black cats on them!!! Eat your hearts out, you young whipper snappers!!
Glue Globber
(2013) Lily loves to make crafts, but tonight she came to me looking completely dejected with some sort of foam ball drenched in Elmer's glue and moaned dramatically, "OH NOOOO!!! Mom .. I am a GLUE GLOBBER." It is apparently a TERRIBLE crime. I just can't believe my sweet baby girl has turned to a life of glue globbing villainy at such a young age.
Monday, October 8, 2018
Glitter Glue
(2013) Lily is laughing so hard she can hardly stand it .... she needed me to open a glitter glue pen for her and I couldn't get it open, so I squeezed it, thinking it might have a hole in the top where the glue came out. Of course it did NOT, and the lid popped off real loud and flew off, and the glitter glue splatter all over my face and hands! We both just sat there stunned for a minute, then Lily Claire died laughing! Yep ... she's my child!
Friday, October 5, 2018
Waffle House
So I’m going to make a confession. Waffle House grosses me out, and I hate to go there. My husband knows this, so he was in shock today when I texted him that I took the kids to Waffle House for breakfast because the boys LOVE it! One of those sacrificial mom moments, I guess. 😂 Anyway everything went fine, it was SORT OF clean, we ate our food (though they only have cold syrup and serve hashbrowns with everything, even a hamburger) and I was starting to think, “Ok, this wasn’t so bad...”. Just as I was entertaining this positive thought, the waiter next to me dumped an entire gigantic bucket of bleach water on the floor right next to where I was eating. Classy. Couldn’t quite swallow down anymore waffle with the bleach fumes floating over the greasy floor by my feet. Check, please. 😂😂
Thursday, October 4, 2018
Bears
(2011) Great. Dylan talked me into watching a show with him on Animal Planet called "Viking Wilderness." One whole part was this long footage of these big bears mating and Dylan said, "Awwwwwww! Mom, look! That bear is hugging the baby bear!!!" Of course I quickly agreed it was "super cute" and then tried to change the subject!!!!
Texts
I signed Bran up a few years back for text messages from a Youth Group at one of our local churches. They text Bible verses, etc. Anyway, his phone went off right in the middle of class today and the teacher looked mad. Bran said, "Sorry, church is texting me" and the teacher said, "Oh ... ok then, go ahead and answer." That cracked me up!!!! Guess when God texts, by george, you ANSWER!
Crazy
You know you've been raised by a Southern mama when .... your husband rehires the cleaning service to help you around the house and you are frantically cleaning the bathrooms and kitchen so they won't be dirty when the cleaning lady shows up!!! 😂😂😂 As we say around here, "Your crazy is showing .. better tuck it back in!!!"
Wednesday, October 3, 2018
Jail
(2015) Funny story from today! Dylan and Lily were playing "cops and robbers" and they had created this fort thing out of blankets, etc, that was supposed to be the "jail." Apparently, Lily was the criminal who had been apprehended and put in the "jail." A while later, Dylan crawled in the jail with her and I heard her say really seriously to him, "So ... What are you in for?" I laughed out loud!!!!
Tuesday, October 2, 2018
British
(2013) Dylan walks through the family room tonight and asks, "Mom, why do all your shows have British people in them?" Guess I've been watching too much PBS lately!!!
Ebola
(2014) I know the disease is not a joke, but Bran just asked me if he'd be able to skip school if he got Ebola. Nice try, Bran ... You ARE going to school tomorrow!
Buffalo
(2012) Got a huge laugh at Dylan's parent/teacher conference today! His teacher was sharing with me a piece he had written about which Native American tribe he would like to have been part of in early America. Dylan chose the Pawnee because "he wanted to hunt buffalo and use buffalo for his tent and clothes and he really loves eating buffalo wings." He seriously wrote that and was dead serious! We were cracking up!!
Monday, October 1, 2018
Ring Pop
Funny conversation in my class today after handing out a small treat that the kids had earned ...
All the kids ... “Thank you, Mrs. Taylor!!! You’re the best!!”
Me: “We’ll it’s because you guys are the best...”
One student after taking a big lick of his Ring Pop and a long, thoughtful pause,”No ... actually you’re really a lot better than us, Mrs. Taylor.”
I completely cracked up!!I’m sure the big Ring Pop candy swayed things in my favor considerably!!!! 😂😂😂
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