(2013) I think I'm being bamboozled ... Lily crawled in my bed tonight and said, "See how much I love you, Mama, that I want to sleep in here with you, rather than all alone in my own room?" Of course, after looking at her little face, it worked. :)
True and funny stories from the lighter side of raising my sons and daughter. As the Southern mama of this crew, I'm usually somewhere between "Bless your hearts!" and "Y'all act like you got some sense!" If we ever need to find our way home, we just follow the trail of red clay and glitter.
Followers
Wednesday, August 25, 2021
Tattoo
(2016) Hilarious teacher moment today ... My skirt today had a slit on the side and one of my 4th grade girls saw the unsightly veins on the side of my calf and said, "COOL TATTOO, MRS. TAYLOR!" Nice. I am now WAY cooler than I thought I was! Hahaaaaaaa!!!!
Loaf
(2016) Ummm.... Dylan just informed me that we need a new "loaf" of toilet paper in his bathroom. Boys crack me up!
Charcoal
(2019) A favorite... 😂😂😂
After a long week, I decided I looked like I’d been run over by a truck, so I decided I'd indulge in a little self repair, including coloring my hair (NOT that I have any gray to cover or anything), taking a hot shower, and trying out this new charcoal face mask product that's supposed to make your skin really clean and soft. I'm doing my thing upstairs and had been settled into our bedroom recliner chair for about 20 minutes, looking quite lovely I might add, in my old robe, glasses, hair coloring goop, and a super thick layer of black charcoal mask drying on my face that's supposed to gently peel off when ready. Now those of you who know my husband, Robert Skeet Taylor, know he is a man of few words. For 28 years he has quietly and patiently put up with all my ideas and antics and shenanigans with school and with the kids, etc, with nothing more than maybe a quiet look of bewilderment or silent resignation. Tonight, however, he walked into our room and took one look at me and stopped dead in his tracks. "WHAT is THAT?!!" he asked SUPER loud, looking at my charcoal face. Well, of course, this got me tickled, and when I starting laughing, the whole dried mask cracked and fell off, which I think threw Skeet into further shock!!! So much for trying to have a beauty spa night in peace around HERE!!! 😂😂😂
Commitment
(2018) Being the non-sport person that I am, I may not have ever really WATCHED any of the kids’ football or baseball games in the past 15 years, but I’ve been a world champ at eating concession-stand cheese fries. Pretty proud of that long standing commitment to my children. 😂😂😂
Wednesday, August 18, 2021
Redneck
(2020) You know you might be a redneck if…
You’re laying in bed almost completely asleep and your husband walks in the bedroom and ask if you’re awake. When you say yes, he responds, “Oh good! Try one of these new barbecue chips” and then you proceed to actually eat one from some bag he’s holding over you while you’re laying in your bed in your PJs in the dark. Yes, that really did just happen in the Taylor household! 😂😂😂😂 Robert Skeet Taylor
Oops
(2018) Lily and I were heading to the grocery store today and got behind a driver who was going 2 miles an hour and not turning at the signal, etc. Lily and I were getting annoyed and yelling real meanly at the driver inside our car to “hurry up” and “pay attention.” At that moment we passed at church that had a HUGE sign on its lawn that said,”Love God. Love people.” From the backseat Lily said, “Oops. I guess God was sending us an instant message. “ 😂😂❤️ We were much nicer to fellow drivers the rest of the trip!!
Favorites
(2013) Bran was pressing me to say which of the kids was my favorite Of course, he wanted me to say it was HIM ... instead I said they were ALL my favorite. Then he asked who was my least favorite! I said, "None of you is my least favorite. I like all of you. I have three favorites" Then, in one last attempt to get me to say that HE was my favorite child, he asked, "If you had to be stranded on a deserted island with one of us, who would you pick?" Without skipping a beat, I replied, "Daddy." And that, my friends, is the TRUTH ... far, far away from all my "favorites" for a day or two!! Robert Skeet Taylor
Monday, August 16, 2021
Stung
(2013) Lily just came in crying and told me she "got stung by a WHOP-ES" (wasp). Indeed she had, poor thing.
Jeep
(2013) So, Skeet got Bran a truck so he could hold onto his beloved red Jeep Wrangler. I hesitate to tell him about this conversation in the car today between Dylan and his buddy, Jackson, both age 10, as we pulled into the driveway this afternoon ...
Jackson: Who's truck?
Dylan: Brandon's
Jackson: Wait. I thought the Jeep was Brandon's.
Dylan: Nope. It's mine now.
Watch out, Skeet!! You may have nothing to drive once the boys are through! :)
Grammie and Papaw
(2011) I was sitting in with Lily and Dylan tonight as they were going to sleep and I mentioned that Grammie and Papaw would be coming over for dinner on Thursday. Lily said, "Good cause I like Grammie and Papaw." Then she asked Dylan if he liked Grammie and Papaw. Dylan replied, "OF COURSE, everybody in our WHOLE family likes Grammie and Papaw ... and I think everybody in the world likes them, too." I had to agree! :)
Saturday, August 14, 2021
Scorching
(2018) I have come to the realization that without air conditioning, I would be a mean, lonely hermit with NO friends or maybe even be in JAIL. I get SO grouchy and irritable when I'm SUPER hot! Case in point, after Lily's cheer photos last week on a SCORCHING HOT turf football field in the dead middle of the hottest afternoon in August (and I was stupidly wearing sweat pants), Lily asked if she could have a snow cone when we were done. OF COURSE, the snow cone truck was parked RIGHT in the sun and I was already super grouchy from sweating to death in the 100 degree afternoon sun in sweatpants! Sweat was actually dripping down my nose, which made me SUPER grumpy and irritated! At any rate, I begrudgingly got in the line (no shade, mind you) for a small, Coke flavored snow cone, and the lady in front me proceeds to order SIX LARGE SNOW CONES!!! Are you kidding me?!! THEN, she asked the guy to name ALL the sugar free flavors first before choosing. She then sends her daughter to inquire about what flavors all the siblings want, which fluctuated about ten times from Pina Colado to Blue Raspberry! After an eternity in the boiling sun waiting for her snow cone buffet to be ready, she looks at the snow cones the man is setting on the counter for her and says she needs MORE flavor on ALL of them!!!! THEN, she takes sample bites of each one and starts to walk away, but NOT before coming back to the window to ask for extra napkins. I literally almost committed a snow cone FELONY at the window before that lady was finished! THANKFULLY we got into our air conditioned car to leave and narrowly escaped my hot, angry descent into a life of crime.
Love Germs
Buddy was very excited when we got home tonight and was licking Lily all over her face. Skeet said, "Lily, don't let Buddy lick your face. He has bacteria!" to which LIly replied, "Oh Dad! Those are just LOVE germs!"
Thursday, August 12, 2021
Good News
(2020) Tales from Middle School ...
Lily came home today and said,”Mom, I have good news and bad news. The good news is our bus driver said he would play music on the bus!”
Me: “Cool! What’s the bad news?”
Lily: “It was Kidz Bop.”😑
Apparently they were all back in their earbuds pretty quickly. 😂😂😂
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Lily informed me that she will NEVER kiss anyone NOT in our family because if you go on a date, it's a complete stranger and he could ha...
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Having a mom for a teacher often means drinking "Dr Thunder" instead of "Dr Pepper", eating "Whales" instead ...